5 Ways To Focus On Love (Everyday)


Ah, Valentine's Day! The one day a year we're expected to show our love and appreciation for our partners....the ONE DAY. I'm all for hearts and flowers, believe me! But, I l try to show my love and appreciation every day. Look, if you're not putting some kind of effort into your relationship for the other 364 days a year, then don't be shocked when your foundation starts to show cracks. Now, I'm by no means saying you do this but...I've been with my husband for 20 years, I know how easy it is to allow your relationship to slip to the the back burner. We're all busy - between kids, jobs, obligations, activities, and whatever else you have going on, it's of no surprise that you have very little time to devote to yourself and your partner. I get it, I've been there, hell, sometimes I'm back there and have to make a conscious effort to shift gears.

It's hard to stay focused on your relationship when so many other "important" things come up - at least we prioritize them as important, but are they really? It's overwhelming sometimes, all of the items on the to-do list piling up and in the back of your head you're trying to remember the last time you saw your partner naked. When that started happening in my marriage, we decided to make a few changes and you know what? No one got hurt, no one suffered...everything got better. You see, when your partner knows you care, when they know you're thinking about them and appreciate them, they are more likely to return the sentiment.

If you're trying to figure out how to make time to focus on your relationship, here are 5 things we do to continually work on ours:

Listening Listening Ears (as my 5 year old would say) - Put the device down! Make an effort to listen to your partner, ask engaging questions and participate in meaningful conversations. Don't make it about the kids or yourself, make it about something your partner is interested in - you never know, you could learn something too!

Touch Me - Intimacy is important! It's also non-existant in some of our relationships. Alone time may seem impossible but making an effort to have some kind of connection on a daily basis is essential. A kiss, a hug, an unexpected touch are all indicators to your partner that you're still interested. Who knows...maybe you'll get lucky after the kids go to bed!

Take Five - Make time for selfcare. Say what? I know, it's not easy, but trust me, even if it's five minutes, it will change your outlook. Try to find time in every day for yourself - have a cup of tea, take a bath, read a book - do something that doesn't involve a "to-do" and is something that you enjoy. Having a few minutes to unwind, decompress and focus on literally nothing allows you to clear your mind and will help you better focus when you need it.

Consideration - Be aware of one another's needs and goals and try to work them into your relationship goals. Showing that you care about your partners plans and including them in yours (and vice versa) will encourage communication on a higher level.

Thank You - Appreciating your partner is a sign that your respect your relationship. Unsolicited recognition for the smallest thing will not go unnoticed. Say thank you, use kind words, be thoughtful. It goes a long way!

Every relationship takes work - Having a healthy one with your partner shows you have the stamina to be in it for the long haul, and it helps create a standard for your children to respect and admire. Working together as a team will solidify your love and appreciation for one another as you continue on your journey!!

Happy Love Day!!

Pay It Forward Friday - Love Love Love Love!!!


You guys! It's back after a looonnng hiatus that is 100% my fault for which I will not make excuses. Pay it Forward Friday is something I started a few years ago after Hurricane Sandy and I kept it going inconsistently. Effective now that changes. It's back. Every week. Every Friday. Because this world needs some goodness and if I can provide a tiny bit of it, well then, great and I truly hope you'll join me! For those of you who are new to Pay it Forward Friday, lemme explain. Think of it as a day of kindness. While I expect most of us do nice things every day via our words and our actions, I wanted to highlight projects, causes, charities, movements that are near and dear to your hearts. This is where YOU come in. I need you to tell me what you're passionate about. What's your cause? What do you want to see fixed, changed, made better? Is there something you want to celebrate? Tell me and we can work together to get the message out.

The goal for Pay it Forward Friday is to raise awareness, and spread kindness, love and gratitude all over this big world we live in, because let's face it, right now we can use all the kindness, love and gratitude we can find!!

So...this week I decided to celebrate love, and I know exactly how. My friends Danielle and Bret are getting married in April and instead of going on a fancy-schmancy honeymoon on a tropical island or touring the Amalfi Coast like a lot of us did, they have decided to go to Macedonia with Habitat For Humanity to build seriously, how freaking cool is that? I think they win the "most unselfish honeymoon" award for sure!! They need to raise some cash for this endeavor so that's where we come in. If you're feeling like you wanna give to a charity and help out some folks who are in need - like they don't have houses and you do kind of need - then make a small donation (think Starbucks latte) and put a smile on your face knowing you just contributed to some worldly good.

For more information, please visit Danielle & Bret's You Caring website and wish the happy couple well as they begin the next chapter in their already kick ass life together (with their ridiculously cute dog Banjo - who you should follow on Instagram for your daily dose of cuteness). 

Mazel Danielle & Bret - have a great time in Macedonia!! And thanks you guys for helping me bring back Pay It Forward Friday!!

Cheers to LOVE!!!


If you have a mission you believe in and want to submit it to Pay It Forward Friday, send an email to and we'll get on it!!